


Right Now I'm Dead

by FaideJour



Category: No Fandom
Genre: Self-Harm, Self-Hatred
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-12
Updated: 2020-01-12
Packaged: 2021-02-27 15:01:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 251
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22229083
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FaideJour/pseuds/FaideJour
Comments: 2





	Right Now I'm Dead

**Part I: Like the desserts miss the rain**

Not technically, but this is probably the closest I’ve been to being actually dead. Today I put an end to it all, and now I just wondering, are people missing me as much as I’m missing them? I used to think that. When I’ll go, no one’s gonna miss me, everyone would move on with their lives, because I’m less that a footnote in theirs’. Now I can’t know if I was right or wrong.

**Part II: Invisible**

I’d rather be loathed than ignored. I always thought that If people ignored me that was because they hated me. It didn’t matter how much real affection they showed to me. It was never good enough for me, because I never felt like I was good enough myself. I don’t like anything about myself, or anything I do. So one person telling me it was okay, or that they liked it, wasn’t enough, because I got the highest expectations, and If I didn’t achieve them inmediately, that could only mean one thing. I was a failure, and I will always be one. There was nothing I could ever do to change that fact.

**Part III: True Colors**

I was afraid to show people how I am really, because If I don’t like myself, how is anybody gonna like someone like me? The moment they saw my true colors, the moment they saw me as I really was, they’ll no longer wanted to be my friends.


End file.
